Wednesday, April 27, 2016


MOCK TALE : INDIAN CORRUPTION LEAGUE AKA ICL 

                                      ##################
 

                               

Did you say "Corruption is as old as Cricket or Cricket is as old as Corruption?" Both are complimentary. The question is not which is old or which is new. Both Cricket and Corruption are games "connoisseurs" play with aplomb. If you hear and see about IPL (Indian Premier League) being openly played under the auspices of BCCI (Board of Control For Cricket in India), what you do not hear and see is the ICL (Indian Corruption League) clandestinely played by the the Ind Con Looters (ICL) under the auspices of the mostly unknown and unseen Board of Control for Corruption in India. Pseudo crusaders against corruption in India like Ar. Kej. and Nit. Ku. can see the game and conduct a "Scam by Scam" running commentary. (commentary does not run but players run away). The Commentators are carefully chosen so that under their big honesty masks the corrupt can can play their game uninterrupted. If any source leaks any information about the ICL played by the ICL under the auspices of BCCI 2, these commentators shout from under their masks, "We are honest". What they do not reveal or the world can not know is they fake honesty in alliance with the dishonest like Sheil and Lal. 

Now how are games of corruption and cricket played? We know in cricket the bowler bowls, the batsman hits and runs or gets out  and he goes to the pavilion. There are eleven players in each side, few bowlers, few batsmen, few all rounders and a wicket keeper. The game of corruption is one to one game. One bowls (gives bribe) and one bats (takes it). There are fielders like Opposition, CBI, ED, ACB, CAG and Courts. All are all rounders, except fielders.  So let us see how Ar Kej and Nit Ku run the commentary without our knowing what all is happening on the "corrupt ground".

"Hi! Kej !"

Hi! Nit !" 

"Welcome to the latest edition of Indian Corruption League" 

"Thank you, Kej!" 

"I congratulate you for your unrelenting crusade on corruption. Did you catch anybody till now?" 

"I too congratulate you too! Did you catch any one?"

"Both said at a time , "No! I dropped all catches." and murmured "Fixed the match!"

"Shall we inspect the ground before the Captains of corrupt teams go for toss?"

"Yes!  The ground seems wet with early money due (aka early morning dew)"

"Natural! Kej! If Corrupt grounds are dry, how can one play? They should be always wet with dew made with treasure brew.  It always intoxicates the players like Mountain Dew."

"True! Nit! You are more experienced than me.  That too now you allied with two most corrupt parties. I am waiting for such a chance once I lose majority votes"

"Wish you good luck, Kej!. The ground and pitch seem green with grass, Kej!"

"It is not grass Nit! You know your ally does not allow grass to grow under your feet. It is Greenback, AKA Dollars. Corrupt convert Rupees into Dollars and stash away in Virgin Islands. This is one such Virgin Island " 

"You are right Kej! You are more experienced here. After all, you receive lot of Greenback from NGOs from abroad."

"Right Nit! Now the Captains of both Corrupt teams are coming out for a toss. I wonder why both are are wearing the same color dress!"

\"Both are Con teams! That is why this ICL invokes special interest, more than IPL."

Now Nit Ku started to run a Commentary on the toss.

"Corrupt Con A Team opted for Heads and tossed the coin. It was tails. Corrupt Con B Team opted to bowl" 

"What do you think the chances of A team, Kej!"

"There is nothing to guess Nit! The A Team is full of bribe givers/takers. B Team is full of bribe takers/givers. One gives, the other takes. It is a tie. All is fixed before only. I am one of the fixers of the game.  Great Fun and Great Funds. This "Fun"Job is for "Punjab"

"Ha, ha, ha! Kej! You are master of the game. Game is starting."

Rewind.

All the fielders CBI, ACB, ED, Opposition, Courts and Judges are in the field to catch at least one corrupt player. There no Umpires on the field. They collected their greenback and went away homes to take their families to the beachfront.

"Who is it Nit? The bowler? And the Batsman. Never seen."  

"You are new to this game Kej! She is IndCon who is bowling. And it is Natlal who is batting."

"Now comes IndCon and bowls a slow ball. Nat hits it and runs one, two, ...sixty lakhs. Wow! Nat hit sixty lakhs runs. The bowler is displeased.. Sleazing started.  They are arguing. What is it? Let me switch on the hidden audio on the ground. Bowler is asking the batsman to give her the sixty lakh runs. He is protesting. Wait for my next ball, she is telling. OK, bowl, he tells the bowler.  She bowls a faster ball, He is hit on the neck  and falls down. Game over. Con Team B wins. Winner takes all sixty lakhs."

"Now it is Warr Andy coming out to bat. Ar. Sin. is the bowler. All the fielders are ready to catch. Ar. Sin. bowls. Andy hits it. WoW! He hit it in the air! More WoW! He too is flying in the air!!! The Slipping Fielder, CBI wanted to catch him if he fell down. No! He is flying, flying, flying, flew away!! The ball is falling down. CBI wanted to catch his "ball" at least. But Ar Sin who is running to say "TaTa, Bye, Bye" to Andy and giving a "flying kiss" to Andy hit him and he fell to the ground. Neither Andy nor his ball  could be caught by the fielder. Ar Sin had a smile. The smile said" You cant do anything. It is already fixed" 

"What do you say, Kej? "

"WoW! This game is better than my invention the "Ink, Shoe, Chappal, Tappad game" 

Nit continued with his Scam by Scam commentary. 

"Next comes Son Gan to bowl to Quat Chi. He too hits it in the air. He and his ball fly away. What a scene, Sir Jee!  I never saw such a game where action replay is seen. Wah! Again CBI wanted to catch the flying Quat or Cat.  He could not. At least his ball? No! A Pa came running and hit him hard.  He fell down again. So Cat flies away. No run in both games. No wickets fell. A great tie, two times."

"What do you say, Kej!"  

He did not reply. "I will start my own League in 2019. I have to somehow keep this guy away.  He is turning ambitious." Kej was in deep thought. Nit knew what he was thinking. "I know my grass well!" he thought and smiled. Kej coughed as if he were aware of Nit thought.

Nit continued. The fourth game. "If this also ends in a grand tie it will be hat trick of ties."

Now comes Sha Pa  to bowl to La Mo . Haaaa! Same result. He flew away. He landed in London. His ball did not fall. Clever guy. He may be playing hide and seek there. 

"That is the end of today's ICL matches. No! No! No! Don't go. One more pair is walking out. It is, it is, it is... Um Sta Ba to bowl to Vi Mal. But they are not Con Team. What do you say, Kej?"

"No! Nit They are the associate team of Con team. Con has so many associate teams."

"You are very experienced with corruption and the corrupt, Kej" Nit had a wry smile.

Kej was angry. Whenever Kej gets angry he immediately takes his fountain pen in hand. It is involuntary.  Years of public life taught him self defence.

"Sorry! Kej! You can not throw that ink on your face and blame me using Charkha! I already removed the ink."

Kej kept quiet, regretting he did not take out his slip shoes ab initio. 

So the ball was thrown by Sta Ba and same result. Vi Mal flew away. Sta Ba looked apparently stunned. But the fielder ED came to him and patted him and said that they knew the whole game. Sta Ba fainted on the ground. Oh! What a game! What do you say Kej!"

"I am thinking we can start our own League by 2019. We can call it IHCL (Indian Honest Corrupt League."

"Very good! But who will lead the League, IHCL."

"Me"

"Me"

"Me"

"Me"

Suddenly there is commotion in the Commentary Box. So many "Me" s came and threw Kej and Nit from there. 

Lord Hanuman saw all this and laughed.  "Oh! My heirs can fly higher and can travel long distances than me crossing oceans and they remind me of Kishkindha! Only difference is, he regretted, I did it to save my Lord and these guys are doing it to shave their Lords, the people." He flew away.

I woke up from the nightmare called ICL. With IPL, ICL and IHCL what is the future of my country, I thought. 


                                  ################## 



SATYAMEVA JAYATHE














Sunday, April 24, 2016

VANI TRISATI - THREE HUNDRED POEMS IN TELUGU ON CONTEMPORARY ISSUES- WITH TRANSLATION IN ENGLISH PROSE AND TELUGU PROSE



VANI TRISATI - THREE HUNDRED POEMS IN TELUGU ON CONTEMPORARY ISSUES- WITH TRANSLATION IN ENGLISH PROSE AND TELUGU PROSE 



తెలుగు భాషలో ఛందోబద్ధంగా పద్యం వ్రాయడం అతి క్లిష్టమైన ప్రక్రియ. 11  తరగతి తరువాతతెలుగు వ్యాకరణంతో పూర్తి బంధం తెగి పోవడమూ
తదుపరి జీవితమంతా ఎక్కువగా ఆంగ్ల భాషాపుస్తకాలే చదవడం వల్ల తెలుగులో కొంతనైనా చందోబద్ధంగా పద్యం రాయాలన్న నా కోరిక అలానేమిగిలి పోయిందిఐతే నా తృష్ణ చల్లారనిది . ప్రయత్నిస్తూనే ఉన్నానుకాని ఏనాడూ ఒక్క పద్యంకూడ పూర్తి చెయ్యలేదు.

It is a difficult proposition to attempt to write a poem in Telugu grammatically. I lost total touch with Telugu grammar rules which are complex after my 11th class. As I was totally engrossed in reading and dealing in English, this desire to write a poem in Telugu remained a dream. But my appetite is unquenchable. So, time and again, I have been trying and failing in the process. But, I could never complete even a single poem.
ఎట్టకేలకునా రాణి వాణి పై ఒక పద్యం మొదలు పెట్టానుచిన్నతనాన నేర్చుకున్న వ్యాకరణసూత్రాలులఘువులుగురువులువృత్తాలుయతిప్రాసలు ఒక్క సారి మననం చేసుకున్నానునాభార్య సలహా తీసుకున్నానుపద్యం పూర్తయ్యాకఆమె కొన్ని తప్పులు దిద్దింది.
ఐనా కొన్ని లోపాలు ఉండవచ్చునాకు తెలిసి ఒక చోట యతి గతి తప్పిందికుదరలేదుసరైనపదంవదిలెశాను.
ఇక మీ ఓపిక.

At last with the blessings of Goddess Vani and with wishes from my wife Vani, I recalled the grammar rules I learned during my school days, referred a few books, took my wife’s advice, as she knew Telugu better than me and compiled the first poem on Godess Vani and Vani. This is called Champakamala, in Telugu lingo. There might be errors and as I stay in Mumbai, I had no option but to depend on my wisdom. As far as I know, there is one clear error. Please correct, if you have knowledge of Telugu grammar.

వాణి శతనానికి నాందీ పద్యము.

కుసుమ లతా విధాన మొక మందర మారుత తుల్య భాషణల్
తరుణివి నీదు భార మతి నేర్పున తీర్పున మ్రోయు ధీమతిన్,
చిన్నతనమందె కష్టముచె భారము మీరగ తీర్పున భరిం
చి సుమ పరీమళంబు శుచి జల్లిన నా యలివేణి వాణికిన్!

Dedicated to Goddess of Knowledge, Vani.

నా చదువుల రాణి వాణికి అంకితం.

Like a creeper blooming with flowers that moves lightly during wind, your words are so mild and touching. As a lady of the house, when you entered our house, you bore your burden with proper judgment and intelligence. When very young you faced unbearable troubles with aplomb. Like the flower creeper, you spread the sweet smell of flowers in my life. I dedicate this to the one woman in my life, Vani.




 




వాణి శతకం PART 7




జనని సేవ చేయ చికిచికి యగుటొప్పు  

లంక చేర హనుమ లేశ్య మవడె 

భరత మాత కొలుతు బడబాగ్ని ప్రొఢునై   

వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 263



English:



To serve the Mother, it is appropriate to become small.  Did Lord Hanuma not become a tiny monkey to cross the fates of Lanka? I will turn courageous to fight the raging fires of dissonance to serve my Mother Land! 



దుర్ముఖి నామ వత్సర శుభాకాంక్షలు 




వచ్చె నేడు యుగాది వత్సర దుర్ముఖి


ముఖము చాటు చేసె మన్మధుండు

దుర్ముఖమ్ము నకును దూరము యుండగ 

వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 264

మన్మధ తర్వాత దుర్ముఖి కదండీ, అందు చేత 

English:

This is an invitation to the Telugu New year Durmukhi! Durmukhi entered today. Durmukhi literally means "An unpleasant Face". Previous year was Manmadha! (CUPID) Once the Durmukhi entered the scene the Manmadha hid his face, as he wanted to keep himself away from unpleasantness.


వలపు తీపి ప్రేమ పులుపును కలగల్పి
కొత్త వధువు లేత కొబ్బ రవగ
చేదు వగరు కలుప చేష్టలుడిగె యత్త  

వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట!  265

English: 

Telugu new year is invited by experiencing six varieties of taste buds. Mixing the sweet taste of affection and sour love, the new bride turns to tender coconut. Once she mixed the bitterness and acridity in the recipe the mother-in-law lost all senses. (A pun on the new bride and mother in law relationships)




సతమతమ్ము యవకు గతమును తలచుకు  

గ్రహము రాశి మారె నిగ్రహించు  
కాక ఫలము (కోకిల) పాడె క్రొంగొత్త రాగము 
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 266

English: Oh! Man! Do not get confused or confounded living in the past. The planet changed their position in the new year. Take a pause. The Cuckoo bird started singing in a new tune .



చింత  వేప మావి చిగురులు వేసెను   

చెరుకు గడలు తీపి కబురు చెప్పె  
రామ చిలుక చెప్పె రాశి ఫలము వాసి
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 267 

English: On the Imli and Neem trees new grown tender leaves are giving a pleasantness. The sugar cane is saying sweet words in conversation. The parrot on the tree is telling the future. (parrotology) 




వలపు పులుపు కలిపి వధువు యుగాదొచ్చె

చెరుకు గడల తీపి తీసుకొచ్చె  
చేదు వగరు కలిపి జాగ్రత్త యనిచెప్పె 
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నొట!  268



జీవితంలో చేదూ , వగరూ కూడా ఉంటాయి, చూసి ముందడుగు వెయ్యమని యుగాది పచ్చడి సందేశం! 

English: The new bride Yugaadi has entered with the sour taste of love with the sweetness of sugar cane. It added the bitterness and acridity to caution that life is not just sweet or sour but bitter and acrid too. 



కులము కుళ్ళు పైన గళము లేపెడి మీ 
వెనుక నున్న వారు వేరె కులమె 
నేను నీవు కలువ మనమంత కాదొకొ 
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట!  269

English: This poem is regarding the crooks who shout in the name of caste less society by grouping people of their own caste behind them. Guys! You shout against caste in the society? Which caste are those behind you?Are they from all castes? Only when you take me into your groups you and me turn to "WE".



కరువు నేల జనుల కన్నీరు తుడువగ 
   కారులొ వెడలె యమీరు యొకడు   



ఖాను ఇంటి నిండుగ స్నానపు గదులెన్నొ    
   జలము ధారగ వచ్చు నాల లెన్నొ  



దొరగా రింటిలొ నీరు, కరువు సీమ  
   కార్చడానికి లేదు కనుల నీరు  



కాసుల రాసులు కాణి కి పరుగులు




    ధనికుల పేదల దారె వేరు 

త్రోవ చూప డాయె త్రవ్వగ బావులు  
కాసు రాల్చ డాయె ఖాను సాబు  
నీటి మూట కట్టె మాటల తోడనె 
కనుల నీరు కార్చె కరువు తీర! 270

English: recently Amir Khan visited a drought-hit village in Beed, Maharashtra. This poem is not about Mr. Khan but rich people who shed crocodile tears. To wipe out the tears of drought hit population a rich man (amir) went in car worth a ten millions. Back at his home there are umpteen number of bath rooms, many numbers of water pipes where water flows like a water falls, there is plenty of water in the house of the rich, in the land of drought even tears dried up.  "Bundles of notes and struggle for penny" , this aptly describes the rich-poor gap.

The rich man does not show a way to dig new wells, he wont donate a penny for helping the thirsty but he packs sweet words in a watery bundle and drops lots of tears to drive away drought.



పగుల కొట్టు ఖాళి పొట్టని తెలుగోడ 
చట్ని నెయ్యి పొడుము చేర్చి వేడి 
ఇడ్లి వడ దోశ సాంబారు తవితీర 
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట!  271

English: Just a fun poem on the Idly Vada breakfast in AP state. Break the empty stomack (Break the fast) with Idly and Vada adding spicy chutney, spicy, tasty powder made of curry leaves and sambar. Add dosa as addendum.


విద్య లేని వాడు వింత పశువు నాడు
చదువు కొనని వాడు చవట నేడు 
చదవ లేని వాడు చట్ట సభలొ తేలు 
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 272

(బెంగాలు పరిస్థితి)

English: I read that in Bengal many candidates for MLA election are illiterates, mainly TMC party.  A satire. Once upon a time it was considered that an illiterate was like a rare animal. Now, if we do not "BUY" education he is a moron. Added to this, now those who can not read or write are landing in legislatures.



భూమి కొక్క దినము భామ కొక్క దినము
కాచు కొనక వారి దోచు టేల  
కరువు లోన కూడ బరువు మ్రోయరె వారు 
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట!  273

English: we have a day for EARTH and a day for WOMAN. Instead of protecting them we are looting them of their assets the trees and the honor. Do the Earth and the Woman not bear the burden of the world even in scarcity and penury?


భూమి దినము నేడు భరత భూమి దినమ
మాత యన నోట మాట రాదె

జైలు కెళ్ళు వారి జేజేలు కొట్టరె

వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 274


English: Another one on Earth Day. Earth Day means it is Earth of India Day for us. But we turn dumb when asked to call her "MOTHER" But we hail those who go jails and return of bail.

చెట్టు తోన చెప్పి పుట్టతోనను చెప్పి
భూమి పడెను ఎంతొ బాధ నేడు 
నరుల ఆశ పెరిగె నరకము నాకాయె
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 275

English: Earth Day again. The earth waled by telling the tree and the burrow that greed of man multiplied and I am suffering hell.

నీరు పల్ల మెరుగు నిజము దేవుడెరుగు 
నీరు లేదు నేడు నిజము లేదు 
బీట వేసె భూమి కాటు వేసెను కల్ల
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట!  276

English: Our ancestors used to say water knows the valley and God knows the truth. But there is neither truth nor water. Earth dried up and lies are biting. 

బడికి వెళ్ళ హక్కు గుడికి వెళ్ళగ హక్కు
బాధ్య తెవరి కొద్దు బరువు వద్దు 
ఊరి దారి వేరు ఉలిపి కట్టెది వేరు
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట!  277

English: A satire on people in Universities and all groups demanding their rights for entering Temples etc.,  People seek right in Universities and for entering temples. None wants to take responsibility. The whole world is moving one side and these guys to the other side.

పెదవి విప్పలేదు పదవి వదల లేదు 
కామి కాడు గాని మౌన గామి
కావడెత్తి మోసె కాంగ్రెస్సు పాపాలు
వాణి పలుకు మాట నాదు నోట! 278

English: He never parted his two lips to talk nor did he ever leave his post as PM.  He is not SENSUAL but is SILENCUAL . He carried the sins of Congress on his shoulders.

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Manikya veena mupanalayanteem 

madalasam manjula vaagvilasaam||
maahendra neel dyuti komalaangi||
maatanga kanyaam manasasmaraami||